Wow... Talk about screwing up a topic, huh? That previous post was supposed to be a discussion... I turned it into a support group. How good am I!? Lmao! Anyway... I jsut got a turn for the better in work, I'm so excited! Craig yesterday... I've been cleaning out the back rooms, organizing, and throwing away a lot of shyt... He comes into the back room, a little tiny piece of it that's partitioned form the rest, looks around, looks at the paint buckets in the corner, and asks me if I'd like to make a rest area out of this room. Like, for the people who work in the front office, when they get sick of the patients. I'm like... Well... And he throws himself back into the one-way conversation. "Well, you'll have to throw all this away and get the rest of the rooms clear, then you can start painting this room, and we'll move in couches and acoffee machine, and Oh, this is such a good idea! I'll even come in and help you! I love painting!!!"

Can someone please, please, please kidnap me? Jsut for about... a month and a half? Until summer ends? LoL OMG... Please, do not make me work in the back rooms with my boss, the perfectionist, who'll be wathcing over my shoulder, making me grit my teeth, snarl under my breath and in other words, make a usually pleasant,relaxing job, into the nail-biting, hair-ripping, tear-crying, I-hate-your-guts-CRAIG period of my life? *lip quiver* Please? *tear* Please? *sigh* Didn't think so... Worth a try, though. Eh, maybe he'll forget and just let me do my stuff... But hey! I get to wear jeans to work now! Not a bad deal! hehe I get to be comfy because I'm working in the back room! hhahah!!! Boojyah!
(Talk about a mood change, huh? lmao!)

I'm in such a good mood these days, I have no idea why. I think it may be because I've finally figured out what to do, and I don't have my emotions pulling me in forty bazillion directions at once. I can freely admit it now, and get over it. It takes me a long time to resolve anything in my head. Mainly ebcause I second-guess and triple-guess myself... Such a mess, i am.

Joe, (please, please, I hope to God you don't read this anymore... It could be very embarassing... and yet, at the same time, I hope you do, because then you'll know exactly what I'm going to say before I say it. Just loop some chains around my ankles, hook me to a cement block, and throw me off a deep-water pier, kk?) I still like you as a friend, and though I remember the days when we were more, I realize that I wasn't ready for that type of relationship, and I shouldn't have thought that I could make myself. (Okay... Now for the fifth time today... I'm going to quit getting interrupted, and finish this damned post!) Up until recently, I haven't been able to pull myself together to tell you exactly how I feel, because I wasn't sure exactly what I felt. (Gabriel, if I jsut wing this, will you please guide my words to make sure they come out right? You're an angel... please?) So, soon as I get up enough courage and alcohol (I'll need it, thanks.), j/k!, I'll give you a call.

It sounds so drama-queenish. *shakes head, smirks* Soda, if you only knew. *grin*It's not that bad, swear. I'm jsut gonna whip out my special line, which I prefer not to wreck the surprise here, and watch the wheels turn, for a smart-ass comeback. *evil grin* It's going to be so much fun... *smirks* Then I'll get the comeback, turn beet red, (Beets aren't really red... they're purpley- why do they say that!?) laugh my butt off and concede defeat. It works in my head... Now why is it so hard? lmao Luv ya... Advice is gratefully taken!

Never There-Cake

Never there....
You're never there....
You're never ever ever ever there.

You tell me that you love me so
You tell me that you care
But when I need you baby,
Baby, You're never there!