Yowch... I was going for something funny and witty to start this off, but I ended up with mountain goats and toaster ovens. Figures... LoL
So, I almost hit Joe and Jeremy today... *cringe* I still wince every time I think about it. I looked both ways, and pulled out, only to hear brakes screeching behind me. I look back, and I'm like, " How'd Joe get abck there?" Yup... Didn't even see him. So, I thought he was gonna kill me all the way to school. I was ready to commit suicide by running myself over, backing up, and running me over again, MYSELF! LoL It was pretty bad.
Anyway... I committed intellectual suicide today... Math quiz. I'm pretty sure I shorted out any connections that may have actually been working in my head, by taking it. *grin* Not really. I think i did pretty well. Of course, I usually think that, make stupid mistakes, and end up getting a 56. yeah... It's jsut me, I tell ya.
So, I'm psyched. I can't wait till prom. What's accounted for the change in attitude? Perhaps the fact that I'm sick and drugged out and mellow, but it could also be the fact that I've heard from almsot everyone that my date is soo psyched up. Makes me feel better. I was really worried that I was making him do something he didn't want to do... *shrug* Just me, again, LoL
So, yeah. I have no idea what I'm doing tomorrow after prom... *shrug* Who knows? LoL I'm not sleeping voer Lind's... So, I'll prolly be at jessie's, then head home so I can get some sleep, or perhaps I will sleep over Jessie's, and jsut... be a cheerleader the next day. *grin* Because I can't run anymore... yay.
Thursday, May 08, 2003
Wednesday, May 07, 2003
Ouch. Abby's finally had it. I'm finally losing my temper, and I beleive that it's going to be for the best. It's not that pissy, furious temper that I lost, it's the cold, cruel, just overall, "Fuck with me and Die" temper. *smiles innocently* Prom is going to be so much fun! Really. I was jsut reading abck my SB, and the most recent one I posted, and wow... There certainly is a change of heart, just in the last... oh, 15 minutes! Wanna play hard-ball? Let's go. And jsut as in drag-racing, I'll win. Don't beleive it? Try me. *sweet smile, cool eyes, wave, sweep, and walk*
I'm such a sap. If I was in one of those old western movies, I'd be the drunk guy at the piano, whining about lost loves, and missed moments. Wow... Look at the alliteration. *sarcastic grin* I'm so cool. BTW... I need to give Missa her dice back. I walked out of her car with them on last night. Got a doctor's appointment this afternoon, for my knee. It's really been bugging me lately, and I don't beleive anyone realizes jsut how much, well, mum didn't until I requested a trip to the doctor's for it. Then, then she knew jsut how much it was bugging me. I hate the doctor's!! HATE IT!! With a passion, like you wouldn't believe. So, here's how her thought processes went:
Knee-has been whining about it a lot lately, doesn't usually whine about her knee, knows I'll make her get it checked out if she does.
Abby- hates doctor's, will never go there voluntarily, suddenly demanding to be seen, as soon as possible.
Conclusion- Not good.
And i jsut got confirmation, but mum places the guilt factor in on it. She feels crappy ebcause I have been whining and she didn't get me an appointment. I'm jsut pissed because I know I could do fgood in my races, so long as I COULD RUN!!!! *snarl* I suck at Life. I admit it. I'm going abck to horseback riding... It was so much easier. I never hut my knee in that sport... *mischeivous grin* Well, I never actually made it better in that sport, either... I jsut wish we could run in the woods more often, and less often on the pavement. *shrug* Eh, whatever. I'll figure it out.
BTW... i was supposed to do osmething this morning, but I can't think of it, for the lfie of me.
List for the day:
Talk to TCapp-ride?
Talk to Christine-ride
Talk to Lindsey-sleepover
Doctor- Knee
Practice- ????
Work- Ugh
Homework- shoot me now, please?
Sleep- Ahh... blessed sleep.
Knee-has been whining about it a lot lately, doesn't usually whine about her knee, knows I'll make her get it checked out if she does.
Abby- hates doctor's, will never go there voluntarily, suddenly demanding to be seen, as soon as possible.
Conclusion- Not good.
And i jsut got confirmation, but mum places the guilt factor in on it. She feels crappy ebcause I have been whining and she didn't get me an appointment. I'm jsut pissed because I know I could do fgood in my races, so long as I COULD RUN!!!! *snarl* I suck at Life. I admit it. I'm going abck to horseback riding... It was so much easier. I never hut my knee in that sport... *mischeivous grin* Well, I never actually made it better in that sport, either... I jsut wish we could run in the woods more often, and less often on the pavement. *shrug* Eh, whatever. I'll figure it out.
BTW... i was supposed to do osmething this morning, but I can't think of it, for the lfie of me.
List for the day:
Talk to TCapp-ride?
Talk to Christine-ride
Talk to Lindsey-sleepover
Doctor- Knee
Practice- ????
Work- Ugh
Homework- shoot me now, please?
Sleep- Ahh... blessed sleep.
Sunday, May 04, 2003
Do you miss me? Hah. I bet.
I miss the fun we had, I miss the good times.
I do not miss the anxiety, the nerves.
I miss the people I hung out with,
I wish I could again.
So what is that all about? Well, I was thinking today. And I feel better, knowing that at least, if at the very least, no one really reads this thing, I can put what I think more about, in it. And to that, I say, "Boojyah!" So anyway... Back to the thinking part. What that above is all about, is I beleive what goes through everyone's heads after a relationship (can you tell what went through my mind, first? LoL). The reason why people are so pathetic after a relationship or special time, me included in that category, is maybe not that they miss the person or event so much, but that they miss the memories, the good times, and that carries over into missing that whole time period.
Not to say that you don't actually miss the person (I give up. I quit trying to rationalize this conversation with myself. I know what I'm thinking about, and I jsut can't keep up this useless facade of neutrality.), but I do believe that the saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," is mroe true than most anyone gives it credit for. *shrug* That's what came up while I was driving in my car, lost on Orange St., listening to some radio song. And I realized something. I do miss Joe, I wasn't lying when I told him that. But, if I could stay frineds, and jsut keep hanging out with him like I used to, it would be almsot as good. I'd miss the intimacy, but... you can't ahve everything in this world, all the time, huh?
Like, when people break up, bonds are cut, ties severed, and it seems that people, instead of using what they had to grow stronger, make more frineds, keep their spirits, instead, they shrink within themselves, push others away, and overall, jsut lose themselves. Maybe some people have to do that to recover. I've done it in the past, I know. But, why? Are you afraid? What of? Afraid you might turn to liking that person again? Would that be so horrible? Or... Are you merely concentrating on their bad qualities, be they annoying, stupid, humorless, or ugly, overlooking their better qualities? And therefore making them seem worse than they are?
Truly, It makes me wonder, because I know how I react to certain circumstances, but why only pull from your own experiences? Why not ask someone about them? But, these are kind of touchy, personal questions to ask, so I leave them in there, hoping someone will IM me, or do something that would make me udnerstand better why people do what they do. *shrug* Just me... Being me. Curiouser and curiouser.
I'm done now. People, please do not think less of me because of my obsessiveness. It will be over in a few months. I jsut won't post much, hehe.
BTW... Great apsta party Ala, It was frieking INSANE!!! Ms. D's face when she saw Tina!!!! LMAO!! That look is priceless. "The bet for Jess Dubey... 2 dollah. A bowl of pasta... 50 cents. Ms. D's face when hse sees her worst student waiitng for her at the door... Priceless." I can see it now, LoL AImee, What a great ride we had!! I think we should go again!! hehe i went after the concert... I found quite a few horse farms, lmao. Great concert!! hehe Wow, ya know, I actually ahd a very busy day today, now that I think about it. *nod* Hottness!! hehe Night all! Bio calls... Damn you to formalin, Mr. Auld!
I miss the fun we had, I miss the good times.
I do not miss the anxiety, the nerves.
I miss the people I hung out with,
I wish I could again.
So what is that all about? Well, I was thinking today. And I feel better, knowing that at least, if at the very least, no one really reads this thing, I can put what I think more about, in it. And to that, I say, "Boojyah!" So anyway... Back to the thinking part. What that above is all about, is I beleive what goes through everyone's heads after a relationship (can you tell what went through my mind, first? LoL). The reason why people are so pathetic after a relationship or special time, me included in that category, is maybe not that they miss the person or event so much, but that they miss the memories, the good times, and that carries over into missing that whole time period.
Not to say that you don't actually miss the person (I give up. I quit trying to rationalize this conversation with myself. I know what I'm thinking about, and I jsut can't keep up this useless facade of neutrality.), but I do believe that the saying, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder," is mroe true than most anyone gives it credit for. *shrug* That's what came up while I was driving in my car, lost on Orange St., listening to some radio song. And I realized something. I do miss Joe, I wasn't lying when I told him that. But, if I could stay frineds, and jsut keep hanging out with him like I used to, it would be almsot as good. I'd miss the intimacy, but... you can't ahve everything in this world, all the time, huh?
Like, when people break up, bonds are cut, ties severed, and it seems that people, instead of using what they had to grow stronger, make more frineds, keep their spirits, instead, they shrink within themselves, push others away, and overall, jsut lose themselves. Maybe some people have to do that to recover. I've done it in the past, I know. But, why? Are you afraid? What of? Afraid you might turn to liking that person again? Would that be so horrible? Or... Are you merely concentrating on their bad qualities, be they annoying, stupid, humorless, or ugly, overlooking their better qualities? And therefore making them seem worse than they are?
Truly, It makes me wonder, because I know how I react to certain circumstances, but why only pull from your own experiences? Why not ask someone about them? But, these are kind of touchy, personal questions to ask, so I leave them in there, hoping someone will IM me, or do something that would make me udnerstand better why people do what they do. *shrug* Just me... Being me. Curiouser and curiouser.
I'm done now. People, please do not think less of me because of my obsessiveness. It will be over in a few months. I jsut won't post much, hehe.
BTW... Great apsta party Ala, It was frieking INSANE!!! Ms. D's face when she saw Tina!!!! LMAO!! That look is priceless. "The bet for Jess Dubey... 2 dollah. A bowl of pasta... 50 cents. Ms. D's face when hse sees her worst student waiitng for her at the door... Priceless." I can see it now, LoL AImee, What a great ride we had!! I think we should go again!! hehe i went after the concert... I found quite a few horse farms, lmao. Great concert!! hehe Wow, ya know, I actually ahd a very busy day today, now that I think about it. *nod* Hottness!! hehe Night all! Bio calls... Damn you to formalin, Mr. Auld!