So, I placed 6th at Regionals. *shrug* Don't get me wrong, I'm Pissed with a capital P. I'm pretty sure I served so much better, and so did everyone else. My mom said that when they got to 4th without calling my number, she swore and was like, "This is Bullshit!" makes me feel better, but... still not so great. I'm a really sore loser... expecially when I know I rode better than I have all season. dammit.

Anyway... I think today was jsut not a good day. Yesterday, I spent 5 hours mucking paddocks, and I rode for two, on the shittiest horse alive- I have bruises on my calves from kicking him so hard!!! And I -still- coulnd't get him to move... dressage whip, kicking, anything!! So, I was so sore after riding yesterday, I could barely move. So waht did I do? I walked for 2 and 1/2 hours straight for a thing going on at my school. And then dave drove me back to the dorm because I -really- couldn't move, and I dropped like a stone into bed. Was up at 5:30 this morning, and out the door at 6, off to Regionals, where I think Belle broke my toe by stnading on it for a good couple of seconds because I was throwing Amanda up and couldn't get her off.... So sore. LoL

So, overall, a pretty shitty day. I'm disgusted, pissed, frustrated beyond words and so ready to cry at any given moment over anything that bothers me, and... yeah, jsut not a great day.

Meh.

Himura Kenshin as soon as Full House is over. I really have decided that is a show for boredom and disgust- Full House, not Kenshin. Kenshin is the newest in a line of Anime addictions, but I am having an okay time with it.. Not like Naruto, where I went through 3 seasons in 4 days... LoL

So, yes. I have decided that what I was thinking about is virtually impossible, due to the nature of the person involved, as well as my own hesitance to not only ask, but go through with it. Who you think someone is, is very different from who they are. And I prefer not to ruin my thoughts of how exquisite I think it is, by absolutely having to know.
Kind of like the Loch Ness monster. Until they absolutely find one, I will believe that it is there and they just can't find it. If it were up to me, I'd leave it completely alone, and just hope there really is one.

Anyway... I have decided, yet again, that boys are slimy. Like...too slick to touch. Just... alltogether nasty. I keep liking them, but for hte most part, they are just icky. Not like, gross or anything, just evil. Like pond slime is evil when you step into the bottom of the lake.

Today was as normal as normal can be, being vastly overrated. The only abnormal event was... I can no longer say I have never given up on anything I care about. *hangs head- looks quite a bit like Sasuke after they couldn't unmask Kakashi- thunk!* I am so disappointed in myself, I could cry. But then, I think about how much I tried to study for this exam coming up, and how much I just couldn't... couldn't make headway, and I realized that no matter how much I love math, I simply cannot keep up with it in this environment... Along with Bio, Chem, History, and Comm. It's not like I did even passably well on hte first exam, so I have no excuses like, "You could do this if you put your all into it." I didn't, but I can't. I have to spread my "all" with four other classes that are more important than an elective. *sigh* Sucks like whoa.

Anyway... At the moment, I am feeling a mixture of disgust at my failure, and triumph at how I'm making headway with the chemistry I had been neglecting to pay more attention to calc. On my own, unrushed, I made it through so many problems, and I'm understanding it. In my own way, LoL

Anyway... REGIONALS in 2 DAYS!!! I'm so pumped! I am gonna kick ass, or go down trying! LoL I jsut hope that I don't get a shitty horse for the first show this season. LoL That would suck big time!

Anyway... *blink* I'm really tired, and it's only 11:30 and it's my night to stay up!

Hey Linch, does this tell you whether I check or not?

Have you ever:
( ) snuck out of the house
(x) gotten lost in your city
(x) saw a shooting star
( ) been to any other countries besides the united states
( ) had a serious surgery
(x) gone out in public in your pajamas
(x) kissed a stranger
(x) hugged a stranger
(x) been in a fist fight
( ) been arrested
( ) done drugs
(x) had alcohol
( ) laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose
(x) pushed all the buttons on an elevator
( ) made out in an elevator
( ) swore at your parents
( ) kicked a guy where it hurts
(x) been in love
(x) been close to love
( ) been to a casino
( ) been skydiving
(x ) broken a bone
(x ) been high
(x ) skinny-dipped
(x) skipped school
(x ) flashed someone
(x ) saw a therapist
( ) done the splits
( ) played spin the bottle
() gotten stitches
() drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour
(x) bitten someone
( ) been to Niagara Falls
(x) gotten the chicken pox
(x) kissed a member of the opposite sex
(x) kissed a member of the same sex
(x ) crashed into a friend's car
( ) been to Japan
( ) ridden in a taxi
( ) been dumped
(x ) shoplifted
( ) been fired
( ) ever had a crush on someone of the same sex
(x) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back
(x) stole something from your job
( ) gone on a blind date
(x) lied to a friend
() had a crush on a teacher
( ) celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
( ) been to Europe
( ) been married
( ) gotten divorced
( ) had children
( ) saw someone die
( ) been to Africa
( x) Driven over 400 miles in one day
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
(x) Been on a plane
(x) Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show -- In the THEATER!!!
( ) Thrown up in a bar
( x) Purposely set a part of myself on fire
(x ) Eaten Sushi
( ) Been snowboarding
() Met someone in person from the internet -- I'm not sure I'd ever want to.
(x) Been moshing at a rock show
( x) Been to a moto cross show
( ) lost a child
( x) gone to college
( ) graduated college
( ) done hard drugs
() tried killing yourself
(x) taken painkillers
(x) love someone or miss someone right now

Wow Linds.. I'm a bad kid. LoL

How can I say how much you mean to me?

Okay, I admit it. I was extremely pissed about basically being forced to go to a show that I didn't want to go to. But... It turned out okay in the end... I suppose. I mean, hell. What is better than a live show involving three fallen riders, two runaway horses, and riding in a saddle that flopped so bad I thought -I- was going to be the next injury?!

Can I jsut saythat whoever tacked up those horses should be shot for malpractice. If there was such a thing. It was RIDICULOUS!!! The first riders girth slipped, and the saddle completely Flipped over, so it was under the horse, the rider was thrown against hte wall and dragged for a while before getting her foot loose. The horse then proceeded to race around the ring, upsetting another horse so that he threw -his- rider, and was racing around. There were somehting like 6 other riders dismounting from their horses, who were starting to friek out, all crowded against the walls, 10 people in the ring trying to catch these two runaways; the one withthe saddle refused to stop for anyone, terrified of the stirrups banging against his belly and legs. Finally, someone jumped out, grabbed his reins, dug their feet in and hauled him around in a short circle, effectively stopping his bolt. Poor boy stood there shaking with fear while they undid the saddle and put a cooler on him. They took him out and replaced him. Both riders were okay, but geez... she wasn't even doing anything and the saddle slipped!!

That was two. The next fall was my own teammate who, on a different horse (May I jsut add I had to ride it in the next class?), fell off becuase -her- girth slipped? That was a bad fall, too. She was coming off a corner, transitioning down from a canter to a walk, and it just... went! She fell on the wall, her head striking the top of, before the horse leaped sideways and she just crumpled to the ground. All the riders on my team gasped and I thought one was going to faint. It looked so bad- we thought she'd be knocked out or something, she hit so hard.

Fortunately, she got up and right back on, after they tightened the girth. Trooper. Everything was fine after that.

I rode the same horse, checked the girth before I got on, and -still- felt like I was going down, that damned saddle was so wobbly. I won first, but geez... That saddle sucked. The horse was a darling, but if he hadn't been, it woulda been a rough ride. *shakes head* Poopishness.

PS. HAPPY EASTER!!! *hop, dance, sing* It's my favorite holiday! WOOT! *grumble* Even if I'm stuck at a dorm.