I've realized jsut how much of a dumbass I am. When I'm busy being obsessed with Joe, I forget to notice the things aorund me, and to think of everything that I should be thinking of.

My family's falling apart, and for once in my life, I'm not exaggerating. I'm so scared, and all I want is for someone to come here, right now, and take me away, take me anyplace, for anything.

I just lied to my dad... And told him I'd had no idea what Seth had been up to... And I think that it's somewhat my fault. He'd told me, but I didn't want to get invovled, I figured that he would make his own mistakes, mom and dad would find out and his ass would be grass.

My head hurts. And my hands are shaking... can someone please come for me? My knight on a white horse, any horse would do, really.

I read back my secret blogger and realize just how much I hate what I wrote, because it can't offer me comfort in my time of need, and that I've become so dependent on others to help me in my time of need.

My riding lesson on Duchess was good, but after, me and Cynthia decided it wasn't even worth riding her anymore becuase no matter what I did with her, Julie was jsut going to ruin it anyway by throing some stupid little kid on who can't possibly ride her the way she needs to be ridden. *shrugs* I'm really rather sad about it, but now I have a horse that no one else uses and I can hide it if he actually starts to get better because no one expects anyhting out of him. *sigh* I'm really sad... I liked Duchess, but the politics in that barn... I can't beleive I have to hide my good horses. It fucking sux.

And Thursday nights at Burrillville... Bush Hopping and Bug Squishing! I love you Lynch!!! hehe And Seth, you make me laugh so hard!! Meagan nad Mitch, it was nice hanging with you for all of 3 mintues!!! LoL

Oh yeah, so... Who bombed that calculus quiz today? Oh wait... That'd be me and half of the class, possibly more. Geezus, what a frelling quiz. I bombed at least half of it, and if I got that graph thingy right, well... I'll be gosh damned! LoL It's a good thing that Juice didn't help me, because he was obviously clueless, too! DUH! I'm so sutpid, sometimes, I amaze myself.

Anyway... Thank you for that talk, Jeremy, it brought up a few thoughts that hadn't occurred to me before, and well... Just thanks. *grin* PS. If you ever want to do the talking, I'll be more than glad to listen.

More later on how the riding lesson goes, (bareback today, I think, yay!!!) and if I go to the park, on that, too! BTW... If anyone wants to come, you're more than welcome! Just come down to the Park, by the waterfall, around 8. (*relaxes to Loreena McKennit- Lady of Shallott*) I wish Ms. Drouin would sing to us more... I love her songs and voice. I wish I could write songs...

Hah. It was cancelled, due to lightning, thunder, and torrential downpours. But of course, it being RI, we were already there for an hour ebfore the officials said screw it and sent us home... YAY.

So, now it's today, but I can't make it ebcause I have an appointment with the hott Dr. Lee. *snicker* Whatever... He's just going to make me hurt. I'm so sore from running on Monday, and ow... It hurts. Nevermind that Ms. Mosher is killing whatever bnrain cells I might have had, with these limit things... and I'm so scared that it's going to get worse. I relaly couldn't handle anything much worse... I'm sutpid, remember? AWW!!!! I HATE SCHOOL!!!!

Okay, so... I'm a little worried. I htink I'm jsut going to start using this as my regular blogger, and perhaps try to not only put stupid, normal shyt inside, but also just... write. About everything. About whatever the hell I want. About whoever the hell I feel deserves a sharp tongue, or a razor wit, or a quick pat on the back. So, there's my disclaimer. Chill and read on, if you dare.

I realized that I really don't want to be at anyone's funeral before they graduate, because I would have to resurrect them jsut to beat them up! And I really don't want to have to bloody my knuckles on someone else's hide!!

And also... I'm stressed. Let me go do my homework. *grin* And worry about running in that Frelling X-Country race tomorrow. Oh wait. WHo can'r even run 2 miles? And wait... isn't that the same person who's race pace is the same as everyone else's slow jog? And Oh! Oh wait!! That's the same person who's name is Abby, and who's running in the X-Country (asa in 3 MILES!!!!) race tomorrow... Right?!?!? Oh YEAH BABY!!!!

Last night was fun. i ended up going over SB's, and watching hardball with her family and Bobby Rambone. Wicked funny, I even got fed!! Then, soon as the movie ended, we flew up to Attleborough, and watched Underworld, which is one of the BEST movies I've seen in a LONG TIME, with Kerri, Crystal, Craig, Ally (Craig's GF), and Brennan.

That movie is sooo good. And to let any of you who know me have an example, I actually sat through the whole thing, nad only fidgeted a couple times, usually when I jumped as something popped out at you. OMG... Wicked good.