Sometimes when you're hurting, kisses and hugs don't help. Sorries, either. Sometimes you feel betrayed not jsut by one person, but by the world. Sometimes, the greatest thing you can imagine is the smell inside an empty little bag where a packet of orange tea once sat, enclosed in its nest of paper, happy and content.

And yet, sometimes, when you're happy, it's the same way- you don't want anyone to touch you or come near you, because you're afraid they might taint your moment, or you might jsut explode and let it all out, instead of savoring it. If, of course, savoring is what you do. And then again, if the greatest thing in your life at a particular moment is the scent inside an empty tea bag, maybe you are just happy with the small things and don't need the big things in life- a blessing in itself. Who knows? LoL

So, anyway... Linds, if you even read this anymore, I'm not sorry for what I did, though maybe just a tad for how I did it. My intentions were right, I went about it in the wrong way. The story of my life. I had more confidence in the peacekeeping ability of humans than I should have. Again, idealism shoots the messenger.

For anyone else who's day I have ruined, or made to feel bad (Brian, Jeremy, and prolly a few others), I'm sorry. It's been a rough time for me, and if you couldn't see that from the very few random bits of stuff I tack up on here, you're dumb! *grin* I'm only half-kidding... heh. But, it's still no reason for me to be a dick, and thanks for putting up with me even when I'm a complete ass, which happens to be most of the time. *shrug* Hey... Live and let live? heh

Not really... Today was a decent day... pretty good, really, until I went to the barn. My horse is really making me doubt myself. And I'm so tired... and obligated. I love life. Whoop de frieking Doo..

LoL
Phat farm hat, and Calculus study groups. Woot! Sometimes, pitch helps, LoL

God... I give up. I'm going to be a bum. I'm not going to college, I'm dropping out of high school, and really... I give up. I suck at life.

I'm so afraid... And when I'm put into a corner, I never know what I want to do, I jsut know that my back's to the wall, so I stirke out any which way. I can't even say what I'm so afraid of, because it's so scary to me, and I don't think it should be, and it's really really dumb, and geez... I'm cracking up.