Dude... These quizzes can bite me.
Friday, July 16, 2004
So, can I jsut say that going to that website, along with hte fact that I have nothing to do before 11, except run, is making me read and play with everything? heh And it's fun! LoL So... Here's my fun quiz, and... an article I read, and relaly, this will jsut be a running post for anyhting I think interesting. *wink, wink, nudge nudge* Duh boys.
A Very True Article Most of Us Never Get
You want the best guy out there? by Brian.
OK, Ladies... Here's a major one to get the best guys out there: The best of the best are even more shy than you are. Why? Because YOU are so important to them that they are afraid to do anything that will either a) hurt you or b) make them look like a complete idiot in front of you. (Better to be silent and thought a fool...)So here's what you do: Select your guy. Now forget about him and find one of the ones who you think of "like a brother." Yup, the one you "wouldn't want to ruin your friendship by dating." Yeah, the one who already knows your deepest, darkest secrets and goes out of his way to do things for you and with you. Things you like.Ok. Now here's the kicker.Ready? ASK HIM OUT! Watch him blush, stumble over his words, and grin like a ninny. Congrats. You've just landed the rare "nice guy" you never thought existed.
*smirk* Um...?
Oh MY GOD!!!! I'm going to be chased up a fence by that man-eating EGGPLANT!?!?!
A Very True Article Most of Us Never Get
You want the best guy out there? by Brian.
OK, Ladies... Here's a major one to get the best guys out there: The best of the best are even more shy than you are. Why? Because YOU are so important to them that they are afraid to do anything that will either a) hurt you or b) make them look like a complete idiot in front of you. (Better to be silent and thought a fool...)So here's what you do: Select your guy. Now forget about him and find one of the ones who you think of "like a brother." Yup, the one you "wouldn't want to ruin your friendship by dating." Yeah, the one who already knows your deepest, darkest secrets and goes out of his way to do things for you and with you. Things you like.Ok. Now here's the kicker.Ready? ASK HIM OUT! Watch him blush, stumble over his words, and grin like a ninny. Congrats. You've just landed the rare "nice guy" you never thought existed.
*smirk* Um...?
Oh MY GOD!!!! I'm going to be chased up a fence by that man-eating EGGPLANT!?!?!
I do think that after half the shit I put up with, most other humans would tell someone to fuck off and get the hell away. Reading through one of my posts, I could still feel the utter panic rise up and threaten to swallow me, as if I was still there, still feeling and seeing and being, everything that was happening that night.
I'm really unsure of what the hell is happening right now, in regards to Nick, but that post brought back the complete uncertainty of whether I wanted to be involved with someone like him, doing what he did. I can still feel the blackness rising up, threatening to overtake me in one fell swoop, and me unable to breathe, unable to say what I want, what I need, for fear that in saying anything, it will all fall out. My fear of not being accepted kept me from speaking out, and for that, I was dumb. But, in hindsight, all is clear. I'm really not sure whether I should keep that to myself, or show my brother, just so he knows what I go through when I hear he's been smoking.
I think I may actually print it up and add it to my wall, where no one will read it, but whenever I have doubts, I can read it and make up my mind about soemthing, and help me reach a decision about whatever's bothering me. *nods* And I would put it on here, but respect for the person Nick has become, as a friend, keeps it where no one sees. If he should ever request it, well... *shrugs* Maybe. But... Off-hand? I think my bro will be the only one to whom I offer it.
I'm really unsure of what the hell is happening right now, in regards to Nick, but that post brought back the complete uncertainty of whether I wanted to be involved with someone like him, doing what he did. I can still feel the blackness rising up, threatening to overtake me in one fell swoop, and me unable to breathe, unable to say what I want, what I need, for fear that in saying anything, it will all fall out. My fear of not being accepted kept me from speaking out, and for that, I was dumb. But, in hindsight, all is clear. I'm really not sure whether I should keep that to myself, or show my brother, just so he knows what I go through when I hear he's been smoking.
I think I may actually print it up and add it to my wall, where no one will read it, but whenever I have doubts, I can read it and make up my mind about soemthing, and help me reach a decision about whatever's bothering me. *nods* And I would put it on here, but respect for the person Nick has become, as a friend, keeps it where no one sees. If he should ever request it, well... *shrugs* Maybe. But... Off-hand? I think my bro will be the only one to whom I offer it.
Wednesday, July 14, 2004
I seem to have lost the will to write. Or possibly, simply the mindset to write the things that I care most about. I hate to blame this apparent "writer's block" on someone, or give myself any kind of excuse, but I cannot help but note a most interesting overlap of the time when this helplessness came about, and when I started hearing nothing good about my writing in Drouin's class. I do believe that she might have traumatized me with the one line I do remember of her many days of harping: "You shouldn't write anything but your name, and even that is in question." Ouch. That touched on the hurting spot. And ever since, I have written less and less quality thoughts, keeping all of my best works in my head, unable to be... brought out into the open.
With that in mind, and with last night's RP set into conscious thought, I am going to try to write my thoughts. Becuase hell, how am I supposed to turn this into a book if I don't write anything down, eh?
Lately, I've been more and more conscious the war, actually thinking about it at length. Before I talked with Joe, it was more of a background thought, the reason for why the economy is hazardous, and other miscellaneous things that you know, but aren't experiencing, so don't really -think- about. The accident, Josh, Nick, T.M., Seth, these are things that are happening in my life, the things that I will remember years from now as the worst happenings in my senior year of high school. The accident that killed one kid, severely damaged another? The only reason I would have thought about it more than the freak accident several months earlier where a girl died, or the suicide a month after that, is becuase I was seeing a good friend of both guys'...
It's all relevant to how you perceive the world, and right now, nothing really hits home unless it's happening to me, even if indirectly. So... the war has never really made a difference in my life in ways that really hurt. After seeing all those pictures, and really thinking about it, this war's got me really upset, and I'm sure most, if not all of you are thinking... well, it's about time, blondie!!!
Really, though, thanks Joe. As always, you manage to open my eyes to the things that should be really important, giving me perspective on the petty little world that occasionally takes over. I'm going to miss you in college, I hope we keep in touch. And really, people, if you haven't thought about the war seriously, I advise you to check it out. It's an eye-opener, and I really hope you learn something, anything, from it.
With that in mind, and with last night's RP set into conscious thought, I am going to try to write my thoughts. Becuase hell, how am I supposed to turn this into a book if I don't write anything down, eh?
Lately, I've been more and more conscious the war, actually thinking about it at length. Before I talked with Joe, it was more of a background thought, the reason for why the economy is hazardous, and other miscellaneous things that you know, but aren't experiencing, so don't really -think- about. The accident, Josh, Nick, T.M., Seth, these are things that are happening in my life, the things that I will remember years from now as the worst happenings in my senior year of high school. The accident that killed one kid, severely damaged another? The only reason I would have thought about it more than the freak accident several months earlier where a girl died, or the suicide a month after that, is becuase I was seeing a good friend of both guys'...
It's all relevant to how you perceive the world, and right now, nothing really hits home unless it's happening to me, even if indirectly. So... the war has never really made a difference in my life in ways that really hurt. After seeing all those pictures, and really thinking about it, this war's got me really upset, and I'm sure most, if not all of you are thinking... well, it's about time, blondie!!!
Really, though, thanks Joe. As always, you manage to open my eyes to the things that should be really important, giving me perspective on the petty little world that occasionally takes over. I'm going to miss you in college, I hope we keep in touch. And really, people, if you haven't thought about the war seriously, I advise you to check it out. It's an eye-opener, and I really hope you learn something, anything, from it.
Tuesday, July 13, 2004
So, hung out wiht Jeremy and SB esterday. Wicked funny. WE took the Panera "virgin" out to eat, then headed to various stores where we goofed off and had fun.
SB and I decided to have some more fun when we got to my house, so... we laughed almost all afternoon. After that, she fell asleep and I watched Rocky Horror Picure Show. She just shook her head when I went to show her how to do the Timewarp dance, lmao we hve to go see that in the theaters. Lol Wicked good!
For graduation, I would have to say my most memorable gift was the box of condoms Steph got me... I think I will always remember that... She was smirking, LoL Wicked funny. Bu, I got a ton of good stuff, including a bath robe. WOOT! I've never had a bath robe, heh
SB and I decided to have some more fun when we got to my house, so... we laughed almost all afternoon. After that, she fell asleep and I watched Rocky Horror Picure Show. She just shook her head when I went to show her how to do the Timewarp dance, lmao we hve to go see that in the theaters. Lol Wicked good!
For graduation, I would have to say my most memorable gift was the box of condoms Steph got me... I think I will always remember that... She was smirking, LoL Wicked funny. Bu, I got a ton of good stuff, including a bath robe. WOOT! I've never had a bath robe, heh
Monday, July 12, 2004
So... Grad Party today, and the last of my friends jsut left- Crystal and Jeremy, about the same time, LoL I love Palo Alto. I really do think that I may have to start buying CD's again, because I love them so much, and it's really the only way to show support anymore. heh No... Just becuase I want the words to the song, and I love having multi-colored jewel cases- don't let the silliness fool you. I'm a crow. I love color and jazz.
Anyway... I love Jeremy. He always makes me feel better, usually just by being there and tlaking. Seriously, how did someone so cool get to become my frined? lmao Granted, he has his annoying points, but who doesn't? I love him to pieces, and if we weren't going to the same college, he would definitely be on the lsit of people I'd miss. Prolly in the top 5. Maybe top 2. LoL But that would be a tough one.
One of the angles that came out in our conversations, was who I'd miss so much in college. And I'd have to say that Joe, Mike, Christine for sure!!!, Jesse, and Aims. There's prolly so many more, but... those are the top ones. Those are the ones whom I've always counted on to be there, whether I liked them or not, and who I'm going to be so sad, devastated even, when they're not in my first period class, to at leat know everything's still normal. *sigh* And even when I get home, it's going to be crazy... How sad.
Anyway... I'm off now. Adios. Too many IMs and way too sleep to really concentrate and write down what I'd like. Though it was a night of introspection and concentrated thinking (yeah right!), I need to wind down and relax. MUAH!
Anyway... I love Jeremy. He always makes me feel better, usually just by being there and tlaking. Seriously, how did someone so cool get to become my frined? lmao Granted, he has his annoying points, but who doesn't? I love him to pieces, and if we weren't going to the same college, he would definitely be on the lsit of people I'd miss. Prolly in the top 5. Maybe top 2. LoL But that would be a tough one.
One of the angles that came out in our conversations, was who I'd miss so much in college. And I'd have to say that Joe, Mike, Christine for sure!!!, Jesse, and Aims. There's prolly so many more, but... those are the top ones. Those are the ones whom I've always counted on to be there, whether I liked them or not, and who I'm going to be so sad, devastated even, when they're not in my first period class, to at leat know everything's still normal. *sigh* And even when I get home, it's going to be crazy... How sad.
Anyway... I'm off now. Adios. Too many IMs and way too sleep to really concentrate and write down what I'd like. Though it was a night of introspection and concentrated thinking (yeah right!), I need to wind down and relax. MUAH!