I seem to have lost the will to write. Or possibly, simply the mindset to write the things that I care most about. I hate to blame this apparent "writer's block" on someone, or give myself any kind of excuse, but I cannot help but note a most interesting overlap of the time when this helplessness came about, and when I started hearing nothing good about my writing in Drouin's class. I do believe that she might have traumatized me with the one line I do remember of her many days of harping: "You shouldn't write anything but your name, and even that is in question." Ouch. That touched on the hurting spot. And ever since, I have written less and less quality thoughts, keeping all of my best works in my head, unable to be... brought out into the open.

With that in mind, and with last night's RP set into conscious thought, I am going to try to write my thoughts. Becuase hell, how am I supposed to turn this into a book if I don't write anything down, eh?

Lately, I've been more and more conscious the war, actually thinking about it at length. Before I talked with Joe, it was more of a background thought, the reason for why the economy is hazardous, and other miscellaneous things that you know, but aren't experiencing, so don't really -think- about. The accident, Josh, Nick, T.M., Seth, these are things that are happening in my life, the things that I will remember years from now as the worst happenings in my senior year of high school. The accident that killed one kid, severely damaged another? The only reason I would have thought about it more than the freak accident several months earlier where a girl died, or the suicide a month after that, is becuase I was seeing a good friend of both guys'...

It's all relevant to how you perceive the world, and right now, nothing really hits home unless it's happening to me, even if indirectly. So... the war has never really made a difference in my life in ways that really hurt. After seeing all those pictures, and really thinking about it, this war's got me really upset, and I'm sure most, if not all of you are thinking... well, it's about time, blondie!!!

Really, though, thanks Joe. As always, you manage to open my eyes to the things that should be really important, giving me perspective on the petty little world that occasionally takes over. I'm going to miss you in college, I hope we keep in touch. And really, people, if you haven't thought about the war seriously, I advise you to check it out. It's an eye-opener, and I really hope you learn something, anything, from it.