I don't know... I jsut don't know... *pout, whine, pine* Is it me, or is it real?? Am i being told it's okay, or is it me just wwanting it to be okay? Goddamn... You can't deny the hell I went though over the weekend and last week. But... My mom did laugh at that stuff, and... well... My mom is usually right. *le sigh* Meh... I suppose I'll take it a day at a time and feel it out.

Besides, my dream told me to. LMAO

Yeha, my dream, cutting to the chase: I was joking around with Finn, teasing him a bit, and being the very unhumorous, literal kid that he is, he took it seriously, and went running to his mom, screaming about, "Mom!! Abby's making fun of me again!! make her stop!" or something to that effect. And I protested, "Finn... I was just teasing you! It's a sign of affection! I only do it to people I -like-, who I think can handle it and know I'm kidding!" Aunt Heather looked me directly in the eye, "Some people think that teasing is a defense mechanism to hide what they're really thinking." I brushed it off with, "Well, that -could- be it, but Pssshhhh..."

I remember waking up thinking, -Affection-. Like... it was the answer. The rest of the dream was not as important as what I said, and what Aunt Heather said. Meh. I suppose we'll see.

Carolyn thinks I'm psychotic. And I'm pretty sure everyone else will too. But seriously, guys... You know I'm the most indecisive person ever, and well... I'm kinda psychotic myself. LoL

Who knows, maybe I'll just... choke on some mac n cheese and not worry about it?? LoL