Ever thought of how interesting it would be if someone followed you around for a day, without you knowing it, just with one huge videotape of a day in your life? I think it would be... interesting. Maybe not every second, maybe not watching you fall asleep in Physics, or watch TV or read your book, but during the moments of the day that -made- your day, to watch the expression on yours and the other person's face, hear what made you both laugh or smile or cry, and just... be able to look back and think, "Damn, that was me. That was us. And I used to love/hate/hide this or that." Wouldn't that be fascinating? Look back a few years later and just watch yourself and all the interactions you had in a day? I guess this is Truman Show to the extreme I'm talking about. But how just... utterly normally interesting.

It is not that I am scared to learn,
Why I'm empty inside.
hold my hand or show some concern,
If I live or die.
My eyes are open wide.
Help me look inside.


More Blue October lyrics. I really really like their music, though some of the lyrics are very disturbing. Not violent, really, just very emotionally stirring and the imagery is amazing.

I'm tired. LoL I'm gonna go to sleep. I'm just so drained right now... Like all the instability I've been has wracked my brain, body, soul to the point of exhaustion, 24-7.

Thank you for not yelling at me. Thank you.