You know, I spent all of yesterday feeling like I was bi-polar. I swear to God, I am. It's probably the only way to completely account for the severity and quickness of my mood swings. And I'm not talking -little- mood swings. You can ask anyone who knows me even somewhat well. They're pretty big.

Well... the past couple of days have been weird, but yesterday, I counted it out, should have been the day I got over everything and was fine again. Was I? Oh... NOPE! I skipped all my classes, forgot to go to my advisor'smeeting, ate one meal the whole day (weird, all in itself), and stayed in bed until 1 in the afternoon, with my pillow and computer, doing NOTHING!!! In fact, the only reason why I got up, was to eat my one meal of the day.

After I got back, I went back to bed until 3, then finally got up at the prodding of Dave and Kevin, sat in their room until 7:30 watching Kenshin, until they left to get food, and then went back to my room, to bed, and played on my computer until I went to sleep. What an exciting day, huh?

So anyway... I understand that most people have lazy days- which is why I called it a lazy day- like I'm going to convinve myself that they reason why I cut myself off from humanity is because I'm "lazy." No.. I was seriously, in the hole, unhappy. About what? Take your pick. I jsut don't know. Life in general.

"It's my fucking life. You would to." - Yeah... I can definitely see how you might, just after the days I've been having. The thing I hate most is drugs, right? And yet... at this point in time, I jsut had a serious contemplation about how it might feel to jsut get a reprieve from what I've been feeling. It's not even like anything bad has happened recently... I just hurt. A lot. In my head. I think I need to see a psych, or get some really good drugs. Definitely a psych.

Anyway... away from that scary shit. Want to hear a funny, let's-all-bash-on-how-Abby's-life-conspires-against-her, story? Yeah, I was supposed to be going to a horse show today. So... I checked all my stuff out- I'm in Robin's car. Cool! So, last ngiht, I stayed up late, but went to bed figuring I could sleep in the car. Well... Kate came in with Katrina last night at 2, woke me up, so wen my alarm went off at 4:30, I was still really tired. But whatever.

So I get dressed, wih my 40+ layers of clothes, and grab my stuff, and head down to the usual meeting place, getting there a little early. I'm sitting there, all alone at 5:30, thinking, "Wow, I'm wicked awesome, being the first one here!" Well.... 1/2 an hour later, I'm still alone, and the only cars that I've seen, were going away from me. So... I'm pisssed. WICKED PISSED. So... I head backto my room, throw my shit in the corner, and head backto bed. I put my phone on silent, planning to be a rebel, but of course, my conscience plagues me with guilt, so I checke dit every five minutes until 6:45. After that, i was like... WELLFUCK THIS!!! Shut the damned phone off and went back to sleep. Now, it's 10 am, and someone's coming to fucking get me, after my bro calls and is like, "Abby, I guess you're at a show, so good luck, but if you get out early or hatever, we have eggs for you to color, since I know that;s your favorite thing to do for Easter, and your eye-candy is over... Oh, yup, Erik!" And All I want to do is go home and color eggs and drool over ERIK!!! GODDAMMIT!!!!

Anyway... It's just going to be a shitty day. I'm resigned to this fact. Peace out. I'm going to a fucking horse show.